Young man looking into the distance from a rocky cliff

Fathers, Be Good to Your Sons

Many of us look forward to weekends, but more and more I’m saddened by a particular phenomenon. It’s the great number of young men out with their children with no mum in sight. It’s pretty clear that most of these men no longer live with the mother of their children. There would be as many reasons for this as there are couples, but one factor would be the man’s inability to be soft and vulnerable. I’m not one to absolve… Read more

Boy running through a field of flowers toward an urban background dotted with mosque spires

4 Parenting Tips to Live By

Every child is as different as every snowflake, so let’s get it straight from the start. Our job is to get our small self out of the way and let them grow. Children need to be raised to be who they are, in all their uniqueness. If you end up raising three children who are very different from one another, then hats off to you. The first trap is a hard one to avoid. With our first child, we tend… Read more

Suburban streetscape with the neon trail of speeding car lights

On Parenting

I just read a great article by Lori Gottliebabout the perils of raising kids today. Not what you might think — stranger danger and screen dreaming — but rather our lack of perspective and failure (my words) to reflect on our own lives as a context for considering how young people might develop important life skills. What I see is a sociological thing playing out. In raising children, we will often compensate by trying our damnedest to ensure our kids… Read more

Colourful block-long graffiti from the 2009 Brooklyn, New York, Art Under the Bridge Festival

The Gift of the Truculent Teenager

As an educator of teachers and counsellors, I never have to wait long to hear the next sentence that contains an expletive alongside the word “teenager.” Having raised three of my own, I’m not unrealistic about the challenges that they can bring. In addition to the expense it takes to keep them in operation, there are numerous aspects to deal with. We have to get used to the weekend nights out without much idea of what’s going on, when even… Read more

The Father-Son Archetype in Therapy

I was recently asked to deliver professional development to some counsellors and psychotherapists on the topic of “men’s issues.” I left my son’s football game to do so and found a gathering of about 60 people. Perhaps 10 of these were men and all but one or two of them sat on the periphery of the very large room. I started by reading a poem called Rain From Nowhere by Murray Hartin. It speaks of a man with a young… Read more